We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize
