shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
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