we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
Randomize
