Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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