Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
Randomize
