and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
Is it because I queefed?
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
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