Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize
