Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
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