Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
i just fell asleep masturbating. I'm no longer surprised i'm single. I can't even pleasure myself.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
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