i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
Im just a social blackout drinker.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
Randomize
