Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Randomize
