worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
Randomize
