i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
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