we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
Life is so much better after having sex.
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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