two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
