I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
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