How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
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