I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
Randomize
