Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
Randomize
