we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
