Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
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