i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
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