so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
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