I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
I am midnight drunk by noon
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
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