How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
