Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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