We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
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