Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
How does it feel to date your dad?
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
Randomize
