So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
Randomize
