maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
Randomize
