the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
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