I changed my tire completely alone.. I could totally win survivor
Its my greatest physical accomplishment
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
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