just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
are you so shy because you have an std?
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Randomize
