remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Randomize
