You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
Randomize
