what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
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