Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
Randomize
