you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
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