Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
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