No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
Randomize
