oh god the rape fog is back!
My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
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