They have a pepper shaker for pot.
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
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