Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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