i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
Randomize
