just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
