He is such a slut. More and more my type.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
Randomize
