Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
