Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
Randomize