Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
Randomize
