I tried to use my car keys to open my door
I just started a sentence with yellow.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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